Taking the kids to Alterac Valley…

4 May

see-full-size-image1There we were…no shit….

Horde forces had just rolled into Dun Baldar with a kodo-load of blood and thunder.  We’d grabbed the North and South Towers and were up to our necks in Alliance defense forces. It was all cold steel and snow in Alterac Valley and to Rainchaser it felt good.  The battle had been fast and fierce, reinforcements were tight and towers were still changing hands as forces battled up and down the valley for control.  Suddenly a horn call went up from the guards in the South Tower.

Force Commander Tah Mahok was furious.

“What? – We just took that cursed thing.  Rainchaser – get up there and flush the vermin out!”

Fist to breast Rainchaser saluted and with Windpaw at her side raced to the constested defense tower.  She was met by a curious sight.  A Tauren Warrior, still mounted had parked himself near the tower’s entrance.  He was in a heated conversation with a Forsaken Rogue and what appeared to be two rather bored and cold Blood Elf Children.  Rainchaser motioned for Windpaw to head in and start scouting the way ahead.  As she raced by the two Horde warriors and their diminutive charges she couldn’t help but wonder why at least one of them hadn’t followed her in.

The very next second she was eating the stone floor and felt hot breath and fangs at the back of her neck.  Fighting desperately, Rainchaser managed to twist and hurl the sleek black form of a shape changed night elf druid off of her.  Windpaw tore into the big cat and suddenly he and Rainchaser were in a very real fight for their lives.  Bleeding and desperate to get to range, Rainchaser bounded backwards out the door, sprawling in the snow.  Like a shot the big cat was on her – all teeth and claws.  Cuffing the druid in the nose she once again managed to gain her feet and raise her rifle.  It was then that she noticed her Horde brethren.  The big tauren was still mounted and the Forsaken Rogue was digging around in his rucksack for something.  One of the blood elf children sucked noisily on a mostly empty carton of sunfruit juice.

“Little Help?” Rainchaser called as the druid pounced her into a snow bank.  As hot fangs clamped around her throat, Rainchaser heard one of the blood elf children say:

“Just let him cap the tower – we need the ‘cheevement.”   He took another noisy pull on the mostly emptly juice box.


Yeah.  That really happened and at the time I was pretty pissed off about it.  There I was in game getting the stuffing knocked out of me by a  monster of a cat druid.  Two of my Horde Blood Brothers anxiously following me around – one mounted on a kodo the other running back and forth.  Both of them sayings.

“Don’t kill him, let him cap the tower!  Don’t kill him!”

Hey – no problem – always glad to help a fellow Hordey out – but for the love of the earthmother SOME ONE TELL THE DRUID TO STOP EATING ME!

Never thought I’d see the day.  Oh my beautiful Horde how far you have fallen.  Trading victory for an achievement.  How does that taste?  Like ashes I hope.  Like dirty, dirty ashes.

Thanks to School of Hard Knocks the queues in Emberstorm were absolutely full this weekend.  When I say they were full – I mean they were stuffed.  Which was awesome.  New games were popping so fast that I could queue up and have a battle waiting on me before I could make it over to the general goods vendor to buy more ammo.

The best part though is that not only were the queues full, but they were full of regular players.  By regular players I mean just that.  Regular players.  The first three or four WarSong Gulch battles I was in had a representative from every class in the game on both sides of the field.  There were warriors and warlocks priests and druids – even some honest to goodness rogues and a beastmaster hunter or two.  Gear was a mishmash of green quest threads, heroic blues and Nax 25 purple.  Some of them had so little resilience on their gear that my explosive shots were jibbing them after only a couple of procs.  The games were fast, random and utterly magnificent.

Normally – when I get into a WSG game on Emberstorm the teams are overweight with Pallies and Death Knights.  The game turns into an AOE fest where you can’t run five feet with out taking damage from Death and Decay or Consecration.  Someone is *always* bubbled, someone is always getting death gripped.  The flags go back and forth and back and forth and no one ever seems to win.  The games churn on and on and on – the killing blow numbers climb and the only team information being shared in battleground chat is someone laughing that they’ve gone over a million points of damage.

So – Thanks Blizzard – you gave me some great games this weekend and I appreciate it.

But lets look at the achievement thing a little closer for next year because I think there’s some room to improve.  I’m a battleground regular.  So when Rainchaser went after School of Hard Knocks I was able to one-shot each of the requirements with no artificial assistance.  I don’t think it was all that hard.  But I realize that there are a lot of folks that really hate PvP and for them, this weekends fun was probably painful.

I’m not sure how you mitigate this.  Maybe open it up to where you can either:

Return a Flag in WSG – Assault a Base in Arathi Basin – Take a Tower in Alterac Valley and Cap a Flag in Eye of the Storm.


Bring 6 Marks from each Battleground.

You choose your level of difficulty.

For non PvPing folks the latter would likely be the route they’d go with.  The worst case scenario they’d have to suffer throught 24 matches.  The best case – they do it in 4 like Rainchaser did.

Sure – it’s kinda lame – but hey – anything is better than rushing back into your WSG flag room to see a bunch of Horde players standing around with their orphans while a helpful gnome rogue grabs the flag – runs two feet – and sets it down for the next Horde player to return.

That’s just sorry >_<


4 Responses to “Taking the kids to Alterac Valley…”

  1. Capn John May 5, 2009 at 14:13 #

    Wow! Talk about tolerance, and changing times. Whenever I encountered the Horde while playing my Gnome Rogue, they always wanted to eat me.

  2. Chawa May 5, 2009 at 21:25 #

    That was a fun read and a great way to capture the essence of current BGs! And to hear that you’ve enjoyed the weekend because of it makes me want to dip my toes in. It’s been a while since I’ve BGed.

    To Capn John – We still do! 😉


  1. Linkage - Orphans fouling up the PVP? « Snake in the Grass - May 7, 2009

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  2. Linkage – Orphans fouling up the PVP? | Reality AFK - July 8, 2011

    […] from 'For the Horde' has a post about it all from the other side of the coin. Hee heee and theres an almost RP flavoured post by Windpaw over at 'Shock and Paw' on the topic that I enjoyed reading. Namthe of 'The View From […]

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